Finger-feeding a baby who can't breastfeed

Sometimes a baby is born with some sort of difficulty which makes it hard for him to nurse properly and or obtain a good latch. Sam was like that. Due to his tongue tie he wasn't able to latch onto my nipples or even suck that well. Only the second day did he attempt a little sucking and by the third day he was able to actually nurse for an entire feeding. So what happened during this time? The hospital staff fed him bottles. I had no choice, really. They did not tell me anything about hand-expressing colostrum (idiots) and they just found it easier to feed him formula, so that was what happened. My sister did give me great advice about that, though. She said to have the nurses use a breastfeeding-friendly method when administering the bottles.

If you read what the internet has to say about that, you'll see all kinds of suggestions from using an SNS (supplemental nursing system), to cup-feeding, spoon-feeding, dropper-feeding, and finger-feeding. The SNS is a really helpful tool (based on what I've read online and heard from mothers who have used them) but I don't have much info since I've never tried it out. Cup-feeding and spoon-feeding sound very messy to me. I know that Sam couldn't easily drink from a cup until he was several months old so no way could I see that working when he was a few days old! Droppers don't sound bad, and I've resorted to using that at times when he was reluctant to eat (I have plastic pipettes).

Which leaves finger-feeding. How does this work? You (or whoever is feeding the baby) wash your hands (important!) and fills a bottle with milk or formula. Then you attach a lactation aid which is really a thin tube that can attach to the baby bottle. Tape the other end of the tube to your finger and let your baby suck your finger as if it's a nipple or pacifier. Release the milk into the tube and your baby is now being fed!

This was a great method to use in our case because Sam was able to build up his sucking muscles while eating, but without the nipple confusion a regular bottle would have caused. I wanted him to learn to suck on skin, not silicone. I actually never did this because the nurses in the hospital were doing it for me, but the technique did work to help Sam suck better, and it got him fed without a bottle!

So if you're in such a situation where your baby can't nurse for whatever reason, don't give up hope. You probably can sort out your breastfeeding issue, whether it's a physical issue like tongue tie, or a milk supply issue. But in the meantime, there is no reason your baby has to be given a bottle. Bottles don't help as well as other breastfeeding-friendly methods do. Plus you can give your baby your own milk most of the time!

Honeysuckle vs Lansinoh breastmilk storage bags

Side by side of Honeysuckle and Lansinoh milk storage bags
Click to ZOOM in for better detail.

I use Honeysuckle Breastmilk Storage Bags when I pump each day. They come sterilized and are mostly non-leaky. I say that because I only experienced a few leaking bags that came from one set of bags (a set is 25 bags), but never again. And I've gone through over 500 bags. They're BPA-free and tamper-evident, as well as recyclable and biodegradable. The milk is sealed with two zip seals (like a Ziploc freezer bag).

What I really like is how the Honeysuckle bags' sides have a nice 1/4"-thick seam and the bottom is nice and sturdy. They claim that their gusseted bottom allows the bag to stand up while you fill it, but I haven't found that particularly true. I haven't seen that in the Lansinoh milk storage bags. I only used those a few times because I got a sample of them with a package of Lansinoh nursing pads.

Lansinoh claims that theirs is the largest bag out there but the Honeysuckle bags also hold 6 oz so that's clearly untrue. Lansinoh bags boast a convenient pouring spout, lay-flat capabilities, double secure zip, write-on tab and BPA/BPS-free - all of which are also present in the Honeysuckle bags. I must add that the "time" space on the Lansinoh is a good idea for people who pump twice a day. Most mothers probably don't care at what hour they pumped, but for some people it's helpful.

Additionally, the part on top where you can fill in information like the person's name, quantity of milk pumped, and date pumped, is straight up, but on the Lansinoh bags they are upside down. I don't know why that is so. While you take a look at the top part (everything above the zip seal), notice how the sides are opened on the Lansinoh bags, but sealed for the Honeysuckle bags (the sides only opened once the dotted line is torn).

As of now on Amazon, the price per 50 pieces for Honesuckle is $9.90 and Lansinoh $10.83.

So in my opinion, it pays both economically and practically speaking to purchase the Honeysuckle bags. They have better features, are nice and strong and they are actually a bit cheaper than the Lansionh bags.

Review of Hyland's Baby Teething Tablets

Hyland's Baby Teething Tablets

I always heard about Hyland's Baby teething tablets from other moms but never thought into them much. After all, when Sam got his first two teeth on the bottom, I barely knew about it. The only reason I suspected teeth was because I felt something sharp when he was breastfeeding. But seriously, I never saw any of the classic teething symptoms (e.g. ear-pulling, crying in pain, biting everything in site, drooling, etc.). So I figured that Sam must be one of those babies who breeze right through the teething stage without shedding a tear. I purchased a bottle of these tablets just in case, but never used them.

I was wrong in my assumption, though. When his top teeth were emerging (a few months later), boy did we see all those teething signs! After a few days of watching Sam suffer I bought these tablets. I can't say they made a 360-degree difference, but it definitely helped.

On their site, Hyland's Baby states this product's indication:

"Temporarily relieves the symptoms of simple restlessness and wakeful irritability due to cutting teeth. Helps reduce redness and teething discomfort."

I bolded the terms that I'd like to mention. Most teething products just anesthetize the area to a degree. They don't do much else. Once the baby licks off the gel or whatever, it ceases to be effective. This homeopathic product, however, works on the symptom level. It calms your baby. It helps your baby sleep better (in fact, it can even induce sleepiness because the baby's pain finally subsides), and it generally makes the kid feel better. Hyland's Baby teething tablets contain:

Calcarea Phosphorica (a mineral) that supports dentition (teething)
Chamomilla (a botanical) relieves the symptoms of irritability
Coffea Cruda (a botanical) relieves the symptoms of sleeplessness
Belladonna (a botanical) relieves the symptoms of redness and inflammation of the gums

Here's how we use them: I shake 3 tablets out onto my palm. Sam loves to pick them up and pop them into his mouth by himself. In fact, I think that excitement alone can take his mind off the pain even for a little bit! They dissolve within a second or two because of contact with liquid, in this case saliva. They taste slightly sweet, which babies enjoy. That's how easy it is to administer! You can repeat this dosage 4 times a day (or 2 tablets every hour for 6 hours).

He doesn't become calm instantaneously, but pretty soon he mellows out a bit. I usually find mornings after breakfast a challenging time with the teething pain so after giving these, he starts rubbing his eyes, looking all tired. And then he naps. It helps him sleep better - he doesn't wake up crying from pain.

On exceptionally painful occasions, I would give Sam a dose of Advil (ibuprofen) to generally ease the symptoms, and follow up with the Hyland's Baby teething tablets as needed.

In conclusion, the downside is that these can be pretty costly (about $7), but they do last a while so maybe that's justified. They taste good and they melt fast. No messy gel application to gums. As if your baby would let you put your fingers into his mouth! I know Sam wouldn't. These are easy to self-serve for him so it works out great. They work quickly but don't offer immense relief (nothing does), yet it's a good combination with a pain reliever medication like ibuprofen or acetaminophen. By the way, an empty bottle of the tablets works great as a teething surface ;)

2/26/15 note: I have come to realize that not all teething is equal. Molars, for example, have got 4 prongs that have to emerge through the gum, but a canine/cuspid is much smaller and only has one little "poke". That's why when Sam got his four "first molars", it was a long-drawn out cranky experience. For about 4 months, Sam had very many miserable times related to teething. This month, in contrast, he got 4 canines/cuspids which barely bothered him. Here the tablets worked very well alone, but with the molars we had to double up with the painkillers.

Ovulation and milk supply drops

Remember I was discussing my random milk supply drops a while ago? Well I finally figured out the culprit, and it's none other than ovulation. Many mothers notice their milk supply decreasing right before they get their periods each month, but then it picks up a day or two after its onset. However, some mothers notice this same drop on or about ovulation. Like me.

Before my period returned, I just assumed that my monthly drops were during my non-existent period. Maybe it was my period getting all geared up for the big day with practice runs each month? But now that I do have a period and can see when I ovulate, I came to realize that these sudden decreases in my supply were always timed on my day of ovulation. In fact, if I want to know when I'm ovulating, I can use those drops as indicators!

This month, Sam has been teething really badly so he is nursing for longer since it apparently comforts and or soothes him. I don't mind! So doing this upped my supply quite a bit (I pumped 4.75 ounces today when I normally pump about 3 oz these days) and my boobs feel full to the touch. Still, my letdown is on vacation. It takes a really long time for it to happen, even 5 minutes sometimes. But I know I have plenty of milk. It's just a matter of releasing it. In addition, the letdown doesn't yield so much at a time. However, if Sam nurses for more than a few minutes, he would stimulate another letdown eventually.

So I should really correct my original line of "drop in milk supply" to "slow and reduced letdown reflex."

Getting a breast pump from your insurance company

I recently got a message through my contact form at the right from Shaffizan, who wrote this post on her blog. She brought up a valid point about obtaining breast pumps from one's insurance company. I'll elaborate on that a bit now.

A good double electric breast pump is an expensive item, no question about it. It's this machine trying to replicate what the human body does, so I guess that's why it isn't cheap. When you have a baby, your expenses rise like a newborn's cry and the last thing you want is yet another important but pricey item to send you over the edge. Just to give you an idea, Amazon has the Medela Pump In Style Advanced Backpack model for $218 and the Ameda Purely Yours for $159. And these are priced at below retail price. If you're like me, you're just not interested in one for that price. Especially when you know they won't last for more than a few years at best.

Enter the new Affordable Care Act which you may or may not approve of. But one thing's for sure, they definitely had breastfeeding mothers in mind (yay!). Under the ACA*:

"Your health insurance plan must cover the cost of a breast pump – and may offer to cover either a rental or a new one for you to keep.

Your plan may have guidelines on whether the covered pump is manual or electric, how long the coverage of a rented pump lasts, and when they’ll provide the pump (before or after you have the baby).

But it’s up to you and your doctor to decide what's right for you."

So the best thing to do is to call your insurance company directly, preferably before you have your baby, and ask them about their breast pump policy. It's probably easier than to go through the ten-inch thick insurance contract book. They will tell you which suppliers they're affiliated with, and you will have to be in touch with them about placing your order. Some insurance companies require you to order the pump within 30 days of giving birth so it's best to find that out early on. It's really that simple.

Now what's if your insurance company won't provide you with the model you really want? Or what's if you want to own a second pump (so you can leave one at work and keep one at home for days off)? Here's a little tip. Since basically everyone's insurance company is providing them with pumps, what's if you don't actually need a pump? They'll still give you one. So these folks now have pumps that are not in use, just collecting dust. Then they sell them on eBay or someplace.

It's not too hard to find brand new still-in-the-box pumps being sold on eBay by people who got them from their insurance companies. How do you know? They come in the same insurance-given packaging (instead of the retail packaging you find in the store). Often, you can find a good deal on these pump since the sellers don't mind making a quick buck and aren't asking for the full retail price anyway. This is how I bought my second Ameda Purely Yours pump for $45 (brand new, never used).

I personally would not use somebody else's already used pump unless I just use the base and buy my own attachments. Even though most parts could be sterilized depending on the model, there are some areas that can't be sanitized well enough without damaging the equipment. Sometimes this works as another cheap alternative: borrow or buy off somebody's actual pump, but then buy the new pump parts.

You can read more about my pumping experience here.

*The ACA will also cover other breastfeeding-related needs such as lactation support. It also requires larger companies to allow pumping time and a place to pump for mothers who require it.

Sleeping training and schedules with a breastfed baby

The words "sleep training" are all a frazzled mother needs to hear to bring on a case of night terrors. We all want our babies to sleep peacefully through the night like little adults, but we don't want to teach them. Much like toilet training - we wish they would just finally use the bathroom like big kids, but who wants to mop up the accidents? Yet, we've all got to do it one way or another, unless you give birth to an angel who sleeps through the night since being a newborn.

First I must mention a few key points:

• Maybe the most obvious one, every baby is different. The sleep tactics that work for your friend's baby may not work as well for your baby. And formula-fed infants may sleep differently than your breastfed baby.
• A sleep problem is only a problem if it's a problem for you. Your baby is fine and is probably getting enough sleep the way he/she is. You only need to sleep train if it bothers you.
• Babies who sleep through the night from day one - sounds like a dream, doesn't it? Well, if you are a full-time working mom and need to pump more than once a day, you probably want your baby to nurse at night to maintain a good milk supply. Which brings me to my next point:
• Nighttime breastfeeding is SO good for your milk supply. This is because the level of milk-producing hormone prolactin is much higher at night and you want to take advantage of that.
• What I found - and this is by no means a scientific, proven theory - is that mothers whose babies sleep through the night very early on stop breastfreeding earlier than mothers whose babies nurse throughout the night. That's just what I noticed among friends and family.
• If you want to sleep train, you and your spouse have to be 100% committed to doing it right. You can't chicken out mid-way. If you don't feel ready, wait. 
• The term "sleeping through the night" (or STTN) has a wide definition. It can mean anywhere from 5-7 hours in a shot, to sleeping 12 hours straight. So take it with a grain of salt.
• Sleep training technically shouldn't be tried until a baby is four months old. However, that's precisely the time their sleep becomes all wacky anyway, so I wouldn't bother until about 6-7 months. Also that's when babies are distracted by daytime feedings, so they cash in on the calories they could get in the peace of night. Don't deprive them!
• Normal napping ensures good night sleep. If don't let your baby nap, thinking they'll be "good and tired at night" you'r just setting yourself up for an overtired baby.
• Follow established sleeping guidelines to know approximately how much sleep your baby needs at night. For example, a one year old shouldn't really be sleeping from 11pm to 8am and having random naps (though this schedule works great for a much younger baby!). 

There are basically two schools of thought regarding sleep training: (1) methods that involve letting a baby cry it out (CIO), or (2) gentle, no-crying sleep solutions. The first has been popularized by Richard Ferber, the second by Elizabeth Pantley. It's really up to you to decide which to use. The first is much, much quicker, but it can be pretty heartbreaking to let your baby cry when you know that a quick feeding will heal all. It's almost always effective and working after a 3-5 days. The second method is long drawn-out process that involves keeping sleeping logs and gently getting your child to sleep through the night, and it can take several weeks to months to achieve STTN.

I'll admit, I bought Elizabeth Pantley's book and found it really enjoyable, as a book. I learned a lot about baby's sleep habits and things like that, but I did not find the ideas implementable. For one, I work so I'm not with Sam all day and can't keep track of all his naps and stuff. Besides, the book kind of relied on the fact that the reader's baby is having normal, long naps each day. Sam took 3-4 smaller naps each day at that point.

Also, I have to say that I don't mind a little seemingly harsh training if the results are effective and if they would help both Sam and I sleep better. So I looked into Ferber's theory and found it pretty simple. I would have to let Sam cry for small increments of time before going in to calm him down and increase those amounts each time.

At the time of training, Sam was about 8 months old. Each night, I would nurse him before bed and then put him (awake) into his crib. He would cry a few minutes later. I'd go in and reassure him. Come out. Cry. Go back in. Usually I'd just rub his back till he fell asleep. Eventually he fell asleep. He'd wake up 2 hours later or less, and I knew he wasn't hungry since he just ate, but I still fed him. He wouldn't even nurse for that long (proof that he wasn't really that hungry). I know some of you might argue that he needed the comfort and all that, and maybe that's true. But he definitely got comfort from all the other breastfeeding times that he didn't absolutely require it every two-three hours at night.

After so many nights of broken up, choppy sleep, I decided we had to train him and we'd do it gently. No cold turkey for me. So I decided to go with reasonable chunks of time, which was 4 hours. If Sam woke up before 4 hours since his last feed I'd let him first cry for a minute or two to see if he actually needed me or would go back to sleep on his own. If his crying persisted, I'd go in after five minutes and then pat him and reassure him and help him find his pacifier. I walked out. If he went back to crying, I'd wait 7 minutes before going back in. Then 15 minutes. I never had to go back in more than 3 times. By the fourth night, he fell asleep for the night on his own without crying. And if it was four hours or more since his last feed, I'd just nurse him back to sleep like I've always done.

You know what? When he put himself to sleep he slept much, much better! He would sleep for longer chunks of time. We used this method to eliminate the 2-3 AM feeding which I really felt was unnecessary since he ate a lot at the 11-12 feeding (right before I went to bed).

So if you're feeling brave and or if you've had it with the incessant feedings and comforting in the middle of the night, try this. You have nothing to lose. Just give it your all. This won't work if your husband feels bad and will sneak into baby while you're chewing your nails in the other room during a crying bout. Both of you should follow the plan you create (e.g. creating a time limit, such as four hours, and using Ferber's method for when your baby wakes up earlier than that).

A baby who sleeps well at night wakes up HAPPY.

Let me know what works for you and what doesn't!

Sam's latest feeding schedule - 12-13 months

I always wondered how weaning works. Does the baby just decided to not nurse one day? Or is it gradual? How do you know how much to feed and to nurse? It's so confusing and there's no rule book! What ended up happening in our case was a gradual breastfeeding decline. Almost as soon as Sam turned one, he would refuse to nurse at certain times and that's when I realized he just doesn't want to eat then. So I followed his cue and nursed only when he was willing. That scheduling turned out like this:

8:00-8:30 AM: Even though Sam wakes up sometime between 7 and 8, I don't feed him until 8 or 8:30 because he did nurse recently in the early AM, which I'll discuss in a second.

9:00 AM: Breakfast time. Sam eats oatmeal cereal mixed with vegetables or fruits. Then he munches on some dry cereal or cut up fruit.

12:00 PM: He gets a yogurt and a drink. Lately he takes just a few sips of breastmilk or water and that's it. He doesn't go for drinking all that much so we have to sneak it in.

3:00 PM: A baby jar of either fruits and vegetables. Snack of corn pops, veggie straws, teensy fruits, Gerber's puffs, etc. Try to get him to drink some more breastmilk or water.

5:30 PM: We enjoy a good breastfeeding/reunion time.

6:30-7:00 PM: Suppertime. Sam usually eats what I make for supper (some of it). Otherwise I defrost some soup, or he has bread and cheese.

7:45-8:00 PM: Bedtime nursing.

12:00-12:30 AM: I breastfeed him before I go to bed. This is a dreamfeed. I don't wake him up for it.

5:30 AM: Breastfeeding.